Wedding Advice: 10 Ways to Include Dad on Your Wedding Day
In honor of Father’s Day this week, I have been reflecting on all the ways that Dads show up for their children on their wedding day. So often I am reminded that a wedding day is a family event, and I love thinking of the ways that my couples have honored their relationship with their father. Some couples have included their dad in traditions and meaningful rituals. Some have been silly and lighthearted. All have reflected the uniqueness of their shared life and story. Here with a few classics, and a few new twists. 10 Ways to include Dad on your wedding day. And please know, I hope you take these ideas and use them for any important male figure in your life: dad, stepdad, or other significant people!
1. Walk Down the Aisle (or a variation of it)
While a father-daughter walk down the aisle is always a classic moment shared on a wedding day, it’s not the only way to share a memory with Dad during the ceremony. It can also look different than what we traditionally think of. Some brides choose to be escorted by both parents. Others may walk halfway alone and meet their dad for the final stretch. Some Grooms also choose to walk down the aisle next to their father, and I think this can be just as important of a memory as a father walking his daughter.
2. First Look
For my LDS couples who might not have the traditional “walk down the aisle” photographed, there are other ways to share a similar special moment together. While the getting ready room is usually bustling with bridesmaids and stylists, inviting your dad in for a quiet moment together can be incredibly special. Perhaps this could be a form of a “First Look” with him. It could also be a chance for him to help you into your shoes, put a necklace or bracelet on, or be the one to deliver your bouquet to you.
For grooms, I love to see them sharing a toast, tying ties together, Dad helping him into his suit jacket, or even exchanging a gift or a letter. Some beautiful gifts include perhaps a handkerchief with a note, an engraved watch, or a framed photo of a special memory. You could also incorporate a piece of his clothing or jewelry into your outfit, like sewing part of his shirt into your dress lining or pocket square.
From there, you can also ask your dad to escort you to your First Look with your bride or groom!
3. Give a Toast or Speech
Invite your dad to give a toast during the reception. This gives him a platform to share memories, offer wisdom, and express his love in a way he may never have another opportunity to do. If he’s not one for public speaking, he might appreciate the opportunity to write a letter that can be read privately before the ceremony.
4. Father-Daughter (or Father-Son!) Dance
The father-daughter dance is also a moment that always gets me so emotional! This tradition is definitely one I support and love to witness at almost all weddings. It can still be personalized. Choose a song that means something to your relationship, and then, if you have the time, choreograph a routine together. This routine can be fun and silly, or it can be more serious. Either way, not only do you get the chance to spend time together practicing leading up to the wedding, but you also have a shared, dedicated space together on the wedding day. And while I haven’t photographed a father-son dance yet, they are becoming more popular! I would love to see more grooms embrace this new trend.
5. Ask Him to Officiate or Be Part of the Ceremony
If your dad is comfortable speaking in front of others, consider asking him to officiate or read a meaningful passage during the ceremony. For my LDS couples, sometimes they ask one (or both!) of their fathers to participate in a symbolic ring ceremony, before or after the temple ceremony.
6. Include a Memory Table or Dedication
For my couples who have lost a father, I love all the ways I have witnessed them honor his memory. Sometimes it’s as simple as a photo gallery on a memory table, a candle lighting during the ceremony, a reserved seat at the ceremony or reception, playing a slideshow, or wearing something of his to feel close to him. Mentioning him in your vows or program can also be really powerful and allow space to feel connected to him during the ceremony.
7. Give Him a New Role
If you are imagining walking down the aisle by yourself or with someone other than your father, you can still give your dad, stepfather, or other father-figure a new role for the ceremony aisle. You could ask him to be an usher, a ring-bearer, a flower thrower, or to stand at the end of the aisle after the procession and throw flower confetti during your walk back.
8. Include Him in the Reception
Consider asking your dad to play a role in the reception! Ask him to emcee or DJ for a short set during the cocktail hour! Even a curated playlist of “dad’s picks” with a short intro from him can add personality to your reception. You could have him create a “Dad’s Special” cocktail or food item on the menu—created by the two of you, or inspired by something nostalgic (like his favorite childhood treat or drink). You can even do a little video or sign explaining the story behind it. Ask him to help you come up with a creative Guest Book idea. You could have your dad write the first message in your guest book, or start a tradition where he writes the first page of advice for your new life together—kind of like a symbolic “passing of the pen.”
9. A Dad-Daughter or Dad-Son Adventure Before the Big Day
Instead of just a rehearsal dinner, plan an adventure day together—go hiking, fishing, golfing, or whatever the two of you love doing together. This can be the perfect time to bond with them before the busy-ness of the wedding day takes over. Take photos together, make a note of it in your journal, or just share your thoughts with him in a private conversation when there is no timeline looming overhead. It is also a great time for you to share with him how you envision him being involved on the day of the wedding….which leads me to my last and final thought!
10. Communicate Your Hopes Before the Wedding Day
Wedding days often feel so hurried and, at times, even stressful. It can be easy to feel distracted or not fully present. Building intentional time for meaningful moments is so essential. If you don’t, it will be over in the blink of an eye and you’ll realize you missed out on time with those that matter most to you! Tell your dad how you want him to show up for you on your wedding day, and how you want to show up for him, too. I would love for all my couples to have a moment with their Dad/significant father figure that is cherished and remembered for years to come.
Michelle & Logan | Southeastern Idaho Wedding Photographer
Michelle & Logan is a southeastern Idaho wedding photographer serving Swan Valley, Boise, Rexburg, Idaho Falls, Grand Tetons, Jackson Hole, and beyond. You can find more of her wedding work here, or contact her here. You can also follow along on Instagram or Facebook.
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